Do you want to create unforgettable connections with quality men? Check out Christian Carter's breakthrough new program "Natural and Lasting Attraction" which is transforming women's lives from the inside out - click here to learn more.

A few women share their experiences after going through Christian Carter’s new program “Natural and Lasting Attraction“.

This video is a good breakdown of Christian Carter’s new program “Natural and Lasting Attraction“.

I’d like to tell you a story…

It’s a story that you might find strangely familiar. Don’t be alarmed.

Once upon a time, there was a woman who was very attracted to a particular man, he had the Adonis Effect.

At first, he was just another attractive man… but the more she got to know him, the more she began to feel attracted to him… and the more time she spent with him, the more that attraction grew into a deep emotional attachment and affection for him.

But there was one problem.

As her emotional attachment grew stronger and stronger, she also grew more and more insecure.

Why?

Because she couldn’t tell whether or not he felt the same way towards her.

Sometimes he would talk to her and say things that led her to believe that they shared a special connection, but nothing ever progressed past the “friendship” stage.

There was an occasional glance, an occasional email or call from him… and a few times, he even opened up about something personal or emotional, and invited her “inside” for a little while.

But something was wrong with the picture.

He just wasn’t acting like a man who was “falling in love”. He was acting like a friend, but at times, even more distant than a friend would be.

And things seemed to be hot and cold. Sometimes he would look at her and talk to her, and sometimes he would ignore her and close himself off.

The insecurity that she felt from all this, became a spiral that amplified itself… and the more insecure she became, the more afraid she grew of “screwing things up” or “scaring him off”, by starting conversations or asking him if he was interested in her and why he didn’t ask her out.

Plus, the more insecure she became, the less time he seemed to want to spend with her.

After spending days and nights obsessing over this guy, the woman finally arrived at the conclusion that if he only knew how SHE FELT, that he would feel the same way.

So she made a bold move.

She TOLD HIM how she felt.

She confessed her feelings and let him know that she wanted to be with him.

He responded by flirting with her and he spent some time alone with her, and they even kissed and held each other.

But soon after, he quickly withdrew, didn’t call her and wasn’t really “available” to her.

This only confused the woman more.

She didn’t know how to take it…

Did it mean that he really loved her too, but that he was afraid of something?

Did it mean that he wasn’t ready for a long-term relationship?

Did it mean that he didn’t love her, and that he was trying to give her a hint?

Did it mean that she hadn’t tried hard enough?

Did it mean that she needed to put everything on the line and REALLY let him know how she felt?

She finally decided that she couldn’t go on like this anymore… she had to be with him.

She had to make sure that he knew just how much she wanted to be with him… so she took a big step, bought him a symbolic gift and wrote him a letter… again confessing her feelings.

And then, something unthinkable happened.

Either he didn’t reply at all… (Ouch!)

Or he replied and she connected with him on an emotional and physical level for a brief time, but then he backed away.

Then she called him a couple of times the following week before reaching him.

He made an excuse about being very busy and said, “I’ll try to give you a call soon, I have to go”… and hung up… but she never got a call back.

Over the following months, the woman tried desperately to understand what went wrong… and what happened.

THE END….

OK, I’m back.

Now, wasn’t that a sweet story?

Heartwarming, huh?

I know… I should keep my day job, and not take up writing romance novels….

Now, let’s talk about that story.

That story is basically a MYTH.

But I’m not talking about FICTION here.

I’m talking about a story that rings true for lots of women. A story that is timeless. A story that resonates at a deep level, because you can IDENTIFY with it.

And why does this particular story resonate for some women?

Because lots of women have been there in one way or another… at one time or another… and many have been there OFTEN in their lives.

Another thing that gives this particular story a lot of power is the powerful negative emotions that it stirs as a result of the powerful negative experiences it brings back.

Stories and situations like this one really FASCINATE me.

They fascinate me because I see them as an opportunity to UNDERSTAND the puzzles about men, women and how we behave with each other.

In this particular situation, I think there is something important for a woman to know…

It lies in understanding a SECRET that lots of women DON’T get.

That secret comes down to the reality that if a man isn’t ATTRACTED to a woman, all of her attempts to share a connection, convince him to like her, and to feel and share love, will BACKFIRE.

In other words, they not only DON’T WORK- they can actually make things WORSE.

In other words, the very things that a woman does to try to make a man LIKE HER, make him NOT like her.

They make him run.

Even though a woman might have nothing but the most loving and positive emotional intentions in the long run, these actually cause the woman feeling them to do things that make the man pull away… and sometimes for good.

It sucks, doesn’t it?

Why does it have to be so hard, right?

But it’s a strangely common dynamic that most men and women really aren’t aware of and don’t understand, even though they’re playing it out.

Hopefully, by explaining the process of how this happens to you, I’ll help you avoid this painful and frustrating situation in your own future…

And maybe you can start to understand what’s going on a little better, if you think about what it’s like when a man you’re NOT attracted to desperately wants your attention, affection and your time.

Have you ever had a guy pursue you?

You know, when a guy asks for your number and maybe you feel awkward turning him down, so you relent.

And then he calls…

As he’s trying to get your attention, approval and affection, all of his pleading and efforts just seem to bug you more and make you want to get away.

Even if all he’s doing is telling you great things about yourself and how he feels about you.

He just wants a deeper connection too.

But does it make you feel the same way that he does, just because he feels it and knows it’s so “real?”

Strange and interesting….

Choices And The Paradox Of Attraction

I’m always fascinated by the idea that we humans don’t always understand the message that we’re communicating to others…

So often we think that because we WANT to communicate a message that others are going to NATURALLY understand what we’re trying to say.

Have you ever seen a woman who dresses over- the-top sexy/cheap and wears way too much make-up?

Have you ever thought to yourself, “I don’t think that her appearance is communicating the message to men that she thinks it is”…?

Yeah, I have too.

Well, here’s the deal:

If you do something to “let a man know how you feel” but he isn’t open to the situation at that time, or he’s not in the right place/right time to hear it, or most importantly - he isn’t ATTRACTED to you, then it’s going to backfire.

Yep… It’s actually going to trigger a feeling of discomfort and disinterest in the man.

And this is just as powerful as the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION.

Once a man feels it, he’ll start behaving differently.

In short, he’ll back off, withdraw, or even disappear.

So what causes this?

And why would a man react this way towards a woman who was trying to be nice… a woman who was giving him her time, compliments, attention, or telling him how she feels affection for him?

Because if you think about it from HIS perspective, you’ll realize that the moment you do something to “confess”, you’ve created a TURNING POINT in the relationship.

Up until that point, you were harmless.

I mean, men know when they are getting some “special attention” from a woman and can sense it.

But now that you’ve started pursuing him and talking about how you feel, you’ve passively posed
several questions that can create NEGATIVE
TENSION:

“How do you feel about me?”

And…

“Do you want to be with me?”

You’ve triggered an emotion that can actually repel a man and make him even more detached from his emotions.

Here’s the thing…

You can’t “make a man like you” or change how he feels about you by doing nice things for him.

Doing “nice” things for a man who isn’t attracted to you, HURTS you. It backfires. Worse, it creates the feeling that you’re trying to bribe him because you don’t think he would just like you for you.

Men are the worst at this, by the way.

They make this mistake over and over again in life because they’re doing what MAKES SENSE to them. They’re doing it because they don’t have an understanding of ATTRACTION.

If you have any guy friends, brothers, etc. in your life who are clueless when it comes to women, then you know EXACTLY what I’m talking about.

When they’re really “into” a woman and they want things to go somewhere or progress, and maybe the woman’s not feeling it for him so much, what does he do?

Usually a lot of things that communicate, “Hey, I think you’re way more valuable, important and higher status than I am… Maybe one day if I give you enough compliments and gifts you’ll start to like me.”

But let me clarify here so you really get it…

If you have a FRIEND (man or woman) and you like them, and you want to make them like you more, then when you do some nice things for them, they will probably actually like and appreciate you more. As a friend.

On the other hand…

If you have a man that you “like” in a romantic way, and he doesn’t “feel it” for you, and you do something nice for him because you want HIM to like you more, it will BACKFIRE… and he will not only NOT like you more, but he will most likely distance himself from you.

Women think that they need to communicate verbally when they like a man… as if that’s part of the necessary process of getting a guy.

In their minds, it goes like this:

Like him>Tell him you like him>He likes you

If you follow this pattern with men who aren’t already FEELING much ATTRACTION or CONNECTION with you, then it’s probably going to BACKFIRE.

If he’s not into you, then it goes like THIS:

He thinks of you as a friend>You tell him you like him>He gets that “yikes” feeling and withdraws…

THE ANSWER

There are really TWO answers to this problem.

The first answer is what to do if you’re in a situation where you like a particular guy, but you don’t know if he likes you back.

DON’T GET HEAVY WITH HIM.

Don’t buy him a big gift, do something nice to show him how much you think about him, or write him a love letter…

Don’t send him a note to his work that says, “From your secret admirer”.

Don’t call him several times, without hearing from him.

And DON’T CONFESS YOUR LOVE for him.

If you want to know how he feels about you, do something to ATTRACT HIM and see how he reacts instead of telling him you love him and hearing the crickets chirp as you wait for his response.

As a rule of thumb, don’t get heavier than HIM. Use SIGNALS from him to find out how he feels… and if you don’t know how to read and create those signals, then LEARN.

Asking a man if he’s interested in you in a romantic way, or if you are “his type”, will actually DESTROY the chances that his attraction and interest in you will grow.

Really.

The SECOND answer is to not get into this particular situation in the FIRST PLACE. Avoid it entirely.

And how does one do that?

One does that by creating ATTRACTION from the beginning.

One does that by understanding the dynamics of how and why the physical and emotional response of ATTRACTION is triggered in men.

One does that by knowing what you’re doing FROM THE BEGINNING.

And what’s the best way to learn THAT skill?

I thought you’d never ask…

Well, I’ve written about attraction before and I’ll write about it again.

In my program, I talk about the very best ways to learn EXACTLY HOW TO MAKE A MAN FEEL ATTRACTION for you.

Notice that I said FEEL attraction for, not talk about attraction with you.

There’s a HUGE DIFFERENCE.

But there’s more to men and dating than just attraction and chemistry, right?

Well, above and beyond the meeting and attracting men “stuff”, in my ebook I also talk about how attraction, communication, psychology and emotions all play into the longer term “stuff” to create a solid foundation for a lasting relationship.

Wouldn’t it be great if you knew exactly how to attract a man for a REAL and LASTING connection and relationship from the start?

Then you could save yourself from those wasted months and years that you might have already spent with guys who don’t really get emotionally involved, invested and connected with you.

In my eBook, I go deep inside the mind of men to tell you the secrets and truths that lots of women will never know about how to create lasting attraction and have him LEADING YOU into a committed relationship.

The eBook is called “Catch Him And Keep Him“.

I’ve spent several years now, studying the ways that women (and men) who are “naturals”, communicate using their words, voice tone and body language.

The way they integrate all these, makes them MAGNETIC to be around. And you probably know what I’m talking about if you know any women who seem “lucky in love”. Where everything involving men seems to come easily and effortlessly to them.

And I’ll tell you… it’s not magic.

You don’t have to be gorgeous or young.

And you don’t have to be LUCKY.

What you DO have to do is LEARN.

It’s a skill, and I honestly believe that ANY woman can learn it if she wants.

But you’re not likely to figure it out by “trial and error”. Many of the keys to making men feel ATTRACTION and want to be around you for the long-term, aren’t “obvious” at all.

In fact, many of them make no sense… and they’re the LAST thing you’d do in a particular situation, IF you didn’t know the SECRETS.

For more about these secrets, go check out my eBook.

It’s jam-packed with insights, concepts, tips and secrets.

Go here to check it out:

http://www.CatchHimAndKeepHim.com/e/main/eBook

Thanks and best of luck in life and love.

Your Friend,

Christian Carter

Want to know a secret about men?

Later in this email I share a “secret” formula for communicating with a man in a way that will draw him out of that defensive and disconnected shell, and instead create a deeply connected long-term attraction between you both.

Learning about it could mean the difference between a guy withdrawing from you and never getting close, or creating that lasting and fulfilling attraction and love that

Here’s the thing…

I realized something this week that gave me goosebumps - in that wierd kind of good and bad way.

It’s that men who pay attention and think about the FEELINGS and EMOTIONS they have, why they have them, what they mean and how to share them are RARE.

And it’s even more unique and special for a man to pay attention to his feelings and emotions inside a relationship with women AND to talk openly about them.

I know this might sound simple and obvious to you as a woman since you’ve probably been around the block with men like this before, but it’s still unfortunately very true.

Here’s why this is important and what I really want to talk to you about-

Let me ask you a simple question…

Why can’t men talk about their feelings?

It’s like they’re helpless morons when it comes to knowing and sharing how they feel.

But mix in a woman and her more natural awareness and ability/desire to communicate about these things and it’s the perfect storm that can make a man withdraw, close off or worse.

So why do men react so weird when you want to talk about things like feelings, emotions, meanings, relationships, commitment, etc?

Why is it that an “emotional connection” for a man can be like kryptonite to Superman?

The answer is pretty fascinating.

Here’s how I see it.

Have you ever asked a man how he feels about you or your situation.

What happens next?

Exactly - he starts acting all freaked out and turns into a deer in headlights.

Or even worse, he starts getting angry and frustrated and turns the conversation back on you with unrelated problems or issues.

Ahhh… spitefulness and contempt.

What’s going on here?

Well, you’ve run into the BRICK WALL guys have with relationships and communication.

And guess what?

It’s YOUR fault.

Yep. It’s all you.

I’m not letting you shift the blame to someone else for what matters most to you in your life.

Why?

Because it’s in your best interest.

As one of my more psychologically enlightened friends like to say:

“Don’t go to victim.”

Here’s the deal-

If you repeatedly discover that someone you’re close to in your life can’t communicate the way you’d like them to, you’ve got 2 choices:

Stop communicating with that person, because you don’t want to try and take on the “project” of getting them to change. I think of this way as working towards ISOLATION in your life.

Provide a solution or alternative. Here you modify the way YOU communicate to start to lead and guide them towards communicating with you the way you want them to. I think of this second way as working towards INTIMACY in your life.

So what’s your choice?

Remember, you have the power to CHOOSE.

So are you one of those women that doesn’t make a conscious choice to do something about how she’s wants to effect change in her love life and her communication/sharing with a man.

And you continue to bang your head against the man’s “emotional brick wall”?

Then shame on you, because it’s your choice.

You’ve probably heard it before, and I don’t like using tired old sayings, but this one is worth repeating:

Wrong me once, shame on you.

Wrong me twice, shame on me.

But lots of women are wronged over and over in relationships until they’ve become convinced that men are idiots and that things can’t ever be different or better.

Quit it for cryin out loud!

Yes, men are often idiots with feelings, emotions and communication “stuff”.

But you know that.

Deal with it and recognize that now it’s your choice and up to you.

You can try the same things that haven’t been working…

Or you can start learning and eventually provide your own “bridges” and solutions for yourself to a more intimate connection with a man.

Trust me, there’s a better way.

But you’ll never figure things out by trying to do things that simply “make sense”.

Planning and approaching complex situations in your life just by what “makes sense” is not only naive, it’s honestly pretty stupid.

Even the smartest people around who run schools, businesses, foundations, etc. have a team of smart advisors they listen to.

They rely on these advisors for outside perspectives - all so that they don’t just act on their own quick instincts, but take a more “integrated” approach.

And it makes their decisions MUCH more likely to work and be successful.

That’s why these people go to school, college, and training.

They study and read, and THEN they go out and make a go of it with everything they’ve learned.

So how much thinking, planning, reading and learning have you done around your communication with others (and more specifically, with men)?

Maybe you picked up the latest best-seller by some publishers daughter on something like how swans mate and are monogamous and you and your guy can be beautiful and happy like swans in love too….

Hey, not a bad idea. Maybe I’ll write a book about that.

Not!

Seriously though….

Are you going to keep banging your head against the emotional brick wall?

Or are you looking to learn?

Good, then let’s get started.

THE “SECRET COMMUNICATION BUTTON” IN A MAN THAT WILL INSTANTLY GET HIM TO OPEN UP… AND HOW TO PUSH IT

Here something fascinating…

Did you know that men have a kind of “SECRET BUTTON” you can push that will make communicating with them almost effortless.

And if you learn what it is and how to use it you’ll be able to get to what he really thinks and feels.

So let me take you through a situation I guarantee you’ve either been in before or you’ll be in with a man….

HELLO!

That means pay attention because this is one of those “universal situations” that can mean priceless knowledge for you.

Let’s say your talking with a man you’re interested in and you want to take things to “the next level” but you don’t know how.

And you’ve been waiting on him to talk to you or express his interest or love for a while.

But he hasn’t done that, and you get a little disappointed and frustrated with things.

You’ve tried being patient and talking with your friends but you’ve got to know how he feels and you need things to move forward.

So what do you do?

Well, most women build up everything they’re thinking inside until they have to let it out in one big emotional release.

And guess what men see when this happens?

No, they don’t see how much you care or love them and how amazing it is that you want to be with them.

Somehow instead of seeing the good and the positive intentions you have, they see intense negative emotions that they can’t understand.

And men get scared of emotions that are really intense or that they don’t understand.

Most of all, they just aren’t used to them.

So when you share your feelings and want to know his feelings for you, he freaks out.

He either becomes the “deer-in-headlights” guy or the “angry-frustrated-scared” guy.

Most women do what makes sense in this situation - they push and encourage the man to talk, to get in touch with his feelings and to share HER feelings.

But men don’t see it as positive encouragement.

They see it as you being “over-emotional” and pushy about the issue.

(Yeah, I know… Men are freakish emotional creatures!)

When you resist or react negatively in any conversation, everything becomes more difficult.

And the WORST mistakes you can make here with a man I call the 4 Deadly Sins:

-Assuming - that he knows what you want or expect
-Begging - for him to “give you” what you want
-Convincing - trying to make him feel the way you do
-Bullying - bullying him into your way of thinking or feeling.

You will never have any long term success with a man if you keep doing these.

You’ll be beating yourself against the “BRICK WALL”.

So what’s the “SECRET BUTTON”?

Well, remember that there’s a catch to all improvements in your life, right?

So the same goes for this button thing.

You’ve got to make it happen by changing YOUR communication first in order to push his communication button.

It’s up to you to get a man’s fears and defenses out of the way so you can get to the bottom of things.

And getting past the masks men can wear with women out of fear is the essence of “pushing the button”.

Here’s the 5 basic steps I’ve recognized that you can use to push his “secret button”.

I’ve given some brief explanations and examples or specifics along with to give you a general idea of what these are.

But I can’t into all the details here in a short newsletter. Like anything that can have a lasting positive effect on a person, it’s a process, not a short trick.

So Here’s His “Secret Communication Button”:

Step 1) The Primer

This is the “starter” for the conversation that will build an entirely positive context - and it might seem like something you could skip, but it’s actually the most important step. To do this, you might do something like starting off talking with positive comments about the time you’ve been spending together and some of the great times you’ve had. The idea is ALL about setting the right context so a guy becomes positive, comfortable and opens up.

And I’m sure you know how guys get when you start talking about issues, problems, intense emotions, etc…Men become babies and shut down. Don’t make that happen here, it’s too important. Even if you’re having a tough time because he’s done something to hurt you lately, you’re interested in him for a reason, so try to remember those things.

You can’t drive this conversation with all the “negative” things - it will never work that way.

Not with men, not with anybody.

Step 2) Casual Introduction

This is the first step into “where things are going”. But instead of springing “the talk” on him like most women can’t help but do, keep talking about positives, the good things, the things you want to continue that are WORKING. If you don’t have too many of these things, think harder. You’re interested in a future with this guy for some reason, right? But don’t just compliment him. Make sure it’s about BOTH of you, and how you are together, not just about him.

You’re goal here in this step is to get HIM to think and start communicating about the relationship and the good things ahead in the future.

You’re helping him build the bridge.

*Important Word of Caution Here….

If you can’t come up with too much positive stuff that you’ve done recently or that you’ve both enjoyed, you might want to think about that and the timing of your “talk”.

Is this the right time and the right place?

Maybe you already know something about the guy and “where things are at”, but you aren’t acknowledging it to yourself. Remember that you’re not here to try and “convince” a man to want of feel something. That’s a losing battle with almost certain failure and heartbreak ahead for you. Make sure you’ve thought things all the way through about what YOU want and if he’ll really make you happy, or if you’re wanting to change him somehow with this talk.

Trying to change or convince in ANY form is NOT a part of this conversation.

If you find yourself doing either, step back, relax and think smart and positive. Stay focused on the REALITY of the situation, not what you want it to be. Think about the positive nature of the ideal relationship you’re looking for and speak from that place and feeling.

Step 3) Applying With Positive Strokes

So now you’re tuning into each other a bit in the conversation and sharing thoughts about the good things you have together.

Then tell him, “Hey, you know what’s great? I bet you and I see things differently, which is OK, but I love spending time with you and we have such a great time together”.

Again, you’re getting into a conversation about relationships that will eventually turn to your situation, but you’re doing it in a way that doesn’t trigger any resistance or fear from the man and this is what you’re aiming for.

Step 4) Non-situational Honesty

Tell him, “You know, I’ve known for a long time that I want a relationship that [explain your ideals about what would make a great relationship for you here]”

Of course it’s up to you to talk about the ideal relationship you want. But there’s a HUGE mistake you need to avoid in this step. Do NOT start talking about how what you have now isn’t what you want or that you NEED to have this ideal relationship with him right now. And doing this might seem like just another thing not to do, but if you make this mistake it will change the ENTIRE nature and context of the conversation - and odds are the guy will change his mood and how open he is to share and listen in half a second flat.

Step 5) Active Listening

Active listening isn’t an idea I came up with. There’s all kinds of great ideas and books on it out there. But what’s it’s really about is tuning into the OTHER PERSON you’re talking to, making them feel heard, and actually LISTENING to the things they’re saying and reading what THEIR emotions and feelings are.

Luckily, I don’t have to teach you much about this since you’re a woman.

It’s the guys we have to worry about here.

But the reality is that the more you listen, the more you’ll be heard. And if you don’t believe me, start trying it with your friends and family.

Once someone gets things off their chest, they’re 50 times more open and available to listen and care about what’s going on with you.

But sometimes it’s tough - you have to be the bigger person and listen first, not be heard first.

If you follow these steps, it will blow a man away.

AND even better….

it will create massive ATTRACTION!

Yeah, imagine that.

By talking about serious relationship “stuff” you won’t scare a guy off.

No, you’ll actually make his attraction for you STRONGER.

How?

Well, men secretly wish that they had women that they felt completely open and comfortable with.

As hard as it might be to believe, they actually like sharing their feelings, thoughts and desires on subjects they usually have a hard time with.

It feels REALLY good to talk about things, especially if they’ve been bottled up!

I bet you’ve felt that too.

When you push the button for a man, he experiences a kind of open and honest communication “release”.

And the more intense the topic or issue is, the more amazing and “freeing” the experience is.

For men, there’s nothing tougher and more foreign than getting really in touch with their emotions and sharing them with someone.

When you’re then one to do this, men almost can’t believe it…

They instantly see you as someone unique, rare and “cool”.

When you can talk about tough issues in a way that makes them easy and fun AND you have the right amount of positivity and “detachment” from the outcome, it makes men EXTREMELY attracted to you.

AND it has the even more elusive and magical benefit of making a man more interested in the future with you.

I call this more “long term” kind of attraction that’s created when you do these things with a man “Intellectual Attraction”.

Do you want to create unforgettable connections with quality men? Check out Christian Carter’s new program “Natural and Lasting Attraction” click here to learn more.

Your Friend,

Christian Carter

Ever wonder how in the world you’re supposed to get closer to a man and connect with him, let alone have a real relationship, when he won’t even open up, listen, or share what’s going on inside?

Like when you seem to be drifting farther and farther apart, and actually talk and share less as time goes on…but the guy doesn’t seem to notice or care?

Where did all the conversation, connection, attraction and passion go to?

I mean, is it really a woman’s “job” to be the one who does all the work just to get a man to actually COMMUNICATE and connect?

The answer is NO….

However the reality is that lots of women have relationships with men that become stuck in a rut this way.

But guess what?

It DOESN’T HAVE TO WORK THIS WAY.

Keep reading and you’ll LEARN how men can go from “emotionally unavailable” and withdrawn with a woman to intimate and connected, WITHOUT you having to do all the work.

But first, let me ask you…

Have you ever felt like you just weren’t able to talk to a man about anything “serious” or important in your relationship? At least not without things turning ugly?

And forget about sharing your deeper feelings, questions, or doubts.

These would seriously FREAK HIM OUT and push his buttons, right?

What’s with men?

Are we completely immature and incapable, or do women share responsibility here too?

Good question.

If you’ve ever felt lonely, disconnected, or unappreciated because you didn’t have a “voice” inside your relationship with a man…

Or if a man didn’t ever “see” or “hear” you, even when you couldn’t have been more open, thoughtful and direct, then you won’t want to miss this email.

THE COMMON WAYS “EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE” MEN WITHDRAW…AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT

One of the most common, frustrating and destructive things men do with women in relationships is pull away or completely withdraw emotionally.

If you’ve ever had this happen and it dragged on, even just for a few hours or days, then you know it can feel like a slow “emotional death.”

Your creativity, energy, and passion all start to wither away and you get drawn into some weird “funk.”

Give me a silent nod if you know what I’m talking about and you’ve experienced the negative effects of “emotional withdrawal” with a man before.

Well, there’s something that lots of women don’t recognize that I want to share with you…

It’s strange, kind of bizarre, and hard for lots of women to believe…but it’s something I’ve observed again and again about men.

It’s that when it comes to emotional withdrawal and distance in a relationship, most men DON’T EVEN UNDERSTAND what it is.

And therefore they can’t notice it or see it as a problem to address when it comes up.

Ok, let me repeat that.

Some men just plain DON’T GET IT.

Got it?

Now, why am I telling you this?

Because lots of women get upset when a man withdraws and pays more attention to his favorite sports team, work, or whatever, and they take it personally…as though the man is consciously doing something to ruin the relationship or to REJECT her.

Wrong.

The truth is that lots of men have no idea how important sharing feelings, emotions, and experiences are to a relationship…and they honestly don’t have much practice at it either.

So when a great woman comes along that he could have an amazing time with and get close to…

And she starts noticing that he has some emotional shortcomings that he doesn’t have all the answers for, or experience with…

Instead of identifying these for what they are (part of his natural “masculine” tendency to pull away and focus in an emotionally uninvolved way) she feels rejected, unappreciated or deadened by it.

How many men do you know who get together with their friends to talk about their feelings and discuss the details and meaning of the relationships in their lives?

Exactly.

That’s why it’s FASCINATING to recognize that lots of men actually value NOT SHARING these things (feelings, emotions, meaning behind relationships).

Men who are this way often say or think things like:

“It’s better if we don’t talk about it…”

Or…”Why do you nag me about this stuff?!”

Sound familiar?

So what’s a woman to do with a man who thinks or talks this way?

Dump him and move on?

Ok, I can’t make that decision for you, but a man MUST BE willing to be part of the learning process that IS a relationship.

Translation - if he’s open to learning and growth in some way, then he’s not a lost cause.

So how open to learning and growth is your guy?

And how open to learning and growth are you?

Or is all this talk about learning to understand more about men feeling like too much “work?”

THE POWER TO UNDERSTAND IS THE POWER TO CHANGE AND GROW

Let me ask you an important question, since men aren’t going to magically change their biological make-up, personalities, or brain chemistry any time soon…

Have you ever thought about how a man’s “emotional withdrawal” actually works, and what brings it about?

I’m asking because I’ve noticed something crazy and fascinating…

Lots of women don’t take the time to think through HOW and WHY a man becomes distant.

(Just like lots of men don’t think through how or why a woman wants to emotionally connect.)

Instead, they jump to immediately feeling frustrated that it’s happening… AGAIN. (Which usually leads to things getting worse, not better.)

And hey…I get that this would be frustrating for a woman, who’s putting so much of herself into the relationship, to try and make things better for him and her.

But there’s a better way than becoming emotionally drained and resisting when a man acts like this…

So what can a woman do to avoid a man’s “withdrawal response” in the first place to save them both the trouble?

And how can a woman deal with this, unfortunately, common situation with men in a healthy way and get back to an open, loving place quickly?

I thought you’d never ask…

STEP ONE:

The first step for a woman is to identify how the man withdraws.

Why?

So she can understand what’s going on when it happens, and not be caught off guard or get carried away with the fear of not knowing what’s happening.

As strange as it might sound, just knowing more about how a man withdraws will keep you in a better emotional and mental state.

Below are a few of the ways men can withdraw and avoid emotional connection. See if you can identify with any of these:

-He doesn’t listen at all or dismisses what you’re saying because he’s distracted, focused on, or more interested in, something else.

-He gets defensive for no good reason, tries to argue and turns the table with anything you say, telling you that you give him too much “drama” and points out your faults.

-He plays dumb. (And maybe he’s not even playing!)

-He immediately responds with irritation and frustration when you mention the distance between you, and tells you that you’re overreacting.

-He’s so wrapped up or stressed by his work or projects in his life that when you do spend time together, he’s still not really there with you. And he seems even more irritated when you try to get him to relax and open up.

-He tries to appease you by acting like he “gets” what you’re talking about, but he doesn’t really listen or take what you have to say to heart. It’s back to the same old guy behavior a few days or weeks later.

-He has no idea what to do or how to start communicating with you on the subject, so he changes the subject or tunes out to avoid talking about it.

Ok. Now, any of these look familiar?

You might even recognize several.

You might even have one or two of these that seem to happen over and over.

I want you to realize that these are the withdrawal behaviors that take place, and I want you to become aware of how they work.

STEP TWO:

Now, there’s another reason for doing all this that relates just to YOU…

I want you to take out a piece of paper right now and write down the thoughts that came to mind as you read this.

First write down, in detail, what it is that the guy you are with, or your ex, did in the past to withdraw.

Then, once you’ve done this, describe how the distance or withdrawal made you FEEL inside.

I’ll give you a minute.

Ok, now that you’ve got your thoughts down, there’s a second step after identifying how withdrawal takes place…

Our minds have a tricky and destructive habit that leads us to make faulty and negative associations between what happens in the world around us and the personal meaning we give them inside.

Let me give you an example…

You probably know people who are convinced that they have terrible luck, so when anything happens they think, “Of course, I’m such an unlucky person…”

These kind of people have a very negative view of everything that happens to them because they see themselves as someone to whom only bad things happen.

I call this “Limiting Beliefs”, and we all have some version of this that fits our own fears and life experiences.

Right now you’re going to identify some of your own Limiting Beliefs around what it means about YOU when a man withdraws or acts distant.

That way, you can better understand and make good choices if it happens with a man again.

Following me?

Good.

So what is the feeling you had when you think back to when a man withdrew from you?

Picture it in your mind.

Now, take that negative feeling and find the “internal state” that it created inside you, which is the general emotional state that you felt.

Realize that the feelings you had, and the state you were in, were a result of YOUR OWN BELIEFS about what the man’s behavior meant.

But here’s the thing…

Our beliefs are NOT often the “reality” of the situations we’re in.

In other words, a man’s behavior DOES NOT have to equal a negative reaction or feeling inside YOU.

Read that line above again.

Good. Now…think about the negative belief inside your own head that created the negative feeling or reaction inside you.

What was that belief?

There might be more than one.

Take several minutes and write it down.

I’ll give you another minute…

So here’s the whole point. It SOUNDS simple, but it isn’t. It’s very powerful…

I want you to try and remain AWARE of the Limiting Belief that you have, that you have identified, so you can start to “un-link” the faulty judgments and reactions that these Limiting Beliefs will try and make for you subconsciously.

And once that happens you’ll start to have your mind “freed up” to make new, productive choices that will naturally bring a man closer to you and make him start connecting with you.

THE CRITICAL “NEXT STEP” TOWARDS IMPROVING YOUR LOVE LIFE…FOR GOOD

We just did a quick exercise that can bring a lot of real, positive change to you and any relationship you have…including a relationship with a man.

But that’s just the first step…the tip of the iceberg so to speak.

There’s a TON more where that came from, and that’s why I want you to take the next step.

KEEP LEARNING.

In my ebook, I talk in specific detail about the common negative beliefs that most women have that keep them from having fun, healthy, lasting relationships with men.

In Chapter 5, I uncover the common positive beliefs and behaviors of the women that men end up with, but would never come out and tell you about for fear of you “using it” on them.

After years of study and observation, I’ve found that there’s a very specific mindset, attitude, and belief system that women who naturally attract men for close, loving, lasting relationships have…

And that women who seem to have the same difficult, painful, or troubled relationships again and again don’t have or don’t get.

In Chapter 6 of my ebook, there’s a section called “Setting Yourself Apart From Other Women.”

In that section I reveal the five specific emotional “habits” that attract men and have them asking a woman to connect and commit to them because they find her SO irresistible.

Go check it out now at the link below.

http://www.CatchHimAndKeepHim.com/e/main/eBook

You can download the ebook and be reading it in a couple of minutes.

And best of all, I’m so confident that you’ll love the ebook and that it will truly help you, that I’ll let you try it for free to see if you like it.

If you don’t get every penny’s worth and more, I won’t charge you a thing. No questions asked.

And yeah, I know that in this day and age, there are a lot of scams and tricks online.

I can honestly say that I’ve been here doing this for years, I’ve helped thousands of women, and receive emails every day with success stories from women who have changed their love lives for the better…just by checking out my ebook.

That’s why I’m willing to give you my ebook for free so you can see if you like it before paying a thing.

All the risk is on me, and there’s no better time than the present.

So go get your copy now.

http://www.CatchHimAndKeepHim.com/e/main/eBook

Thanks and best of luck in life and love.

Your Friend,

Christian Carter